Summer is heating up. And so is yours truly in all her hot flashing glory. (We'll get to the cherry almond crisp recipe in a moment- but first I have to get something off my chest.)
Last night my husband was scanning channels on cable. I sat down next to him, (quickie dinner plate perched on my knee) and crunched romaine lettuce, almonds and dried cherries as he watched the end of the Shawshank Redemption. One of his favorite movies. An affection shared by many a cinephile. This is a beloved film.
Then I heard it.
A line that stung and burned so deep and hot I stopped chewing. I stopped breathing. I sat as still as the fork on my uneaten plate of salad.
The despicable, murdering bully of a prison guard is being led away by police. We hear the voice of
The ultimate put down. Not only did he cry. He cried like a girl.
Because, really, who would ever want to be caught crying like a girl? It's the ultimate in weakness. The worst thing you could say about a man. It's dependent. It's needy. It's unmanly. Inadequate. Irrational. Disgusting.
Worthy of contempt.
A flood of sneers and mocking imagery ran through my head. All the put-downs of childhood endured and encoded in the hippocampus, stashed away for safe keeping.
You throw like a girl. You run like a girl. You cry like a girl.
Bullies. Belittling. Because girls are less worthy. Less capable. Less whole.
It's a message our culture delivers every day, via media of all kinds. From raunchy punchlines about yeast infections to commercials for thigh cream, from political pundits calling single women sluts, to the latest (oops!) leaked sex tape, from a misogynist song lyric that rhymes with witch to the impossibly high platform heels women teeter in, hobbled for fashion's sake, shoes designed for prey.
I think about this and our nation's Cult of Youth as I walk and sigh at twilight, wearing Converse sneakers and photographing violet shadows with my iPhone.
How often are girls and women celebrated for something other than appearance- a pretty object to penetrate, to own, or rate on a scale of one to ten.
And after a certain age- it only gets worse.
Just look at Botox sales stats. Women fear aging with a depth of disgust unfathomable. We are buoyed on an ocean of revulsion toward aging. Why else would we fail- collectively- to tell the honest truth about plastic surgery and the freakish waxy desperation it exudes? There isn't an actress over the age of 30 who can express worry or surprise with her forehead muscles any more (well that's an exaggeration. There are, maybe... three?).
Ask yourself- how often do we get to see ourselves depicted honestly, as complicated, brave, strong, authentically sexual- never mind brilliant, sassy, dimensional - and not be reduced to mere object or caricature?
Or worse, invisible.
This keeps me up at night. This girl stuff. This aging stuff. This what-do-I-do-next stuff. My hip starts to ache and I lie in the dark and feel no closer to solving my dilemma than I did yesterday. Or the day before.
I am sorry to say, I am no closer to an answer.
But at least I've told something true.
Gluten-Free Cherry Almond Crisp RecipeBy Karina Allrich June 2013.
The flavor combo of brown sugar, cinnamon, sliced almonds and quinoa flakes creates a melt-in-your-mouth gluten-free crumble topping that gentles the dark tart taste of sweet summer cherries. I used organic coconut oil to keep it vegan.
6 cups organic dark cherries
1 tablespoon cornstarch or tapioca starch
1 tablespoon sugar
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup sorghum flour
1/2 cup brown rice flour, millet flour, or certified gluten-free oat flour
1/2 cup quinoa flakes
1/2 teaspoon fine sea salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon almond extract
1/2 cup organic virgin coconut oil
1/2 cup sliced almonds
Preheat the oven to 375º. Lightly grease an 8 or 9-inch square baking dish or four 4-inch ramekins.
Wash, halve, pit, and stem the cherries. Place them in a bowl and sprinkle with cornstarch and 1 tablespoon sugar. Toss to coat. Pour into the baking dish or ramekins. Set aside.
In a separate mixing bowl, whisk together the brown sugar, brown rice flour, white rice flour, quinoa flakes, sea salt and cinnamon. Sprinkle with the almond extract. Add the coconut oil. Stir with a fork until sandy textured and crumbly. Add in the sliced almonds. Stir to combine.
Add the crumble topping to the cherries.
Bake in the center of the oven for 50 to 55 minutes until the cherries are bubbling and soft (ramekins may take a little less time). Note- cover with foil at 30-40 minutes, if the topping starts to get too browned.
Cool the crisp on a wire rack. Lovely served warm.
A scoop of coconut vanilla ice cream is optional.
Recipe Source: glutenfreegoddess.blogspot.com
All images & content are copyright protected, all rights reserved. Please do not use our images or content without prior permission. Thank you.
For substitution help, please see my guide to baking with substitutions here.